You might have come across some of the Pakalu Papito tweets on Twitter. You’ll enjoy his snarky wit and self-deprecating humor. Let’s check out the best of these tweets together; you might even find yourself nodding in agreement to some of these.
1. For those living alone
*falls into trashcan*
nice so good to finally be home
— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) September 4, 2015
2. While we are on the same topic of living alone….
If you are lonely, dim all lights and put on a horror-movie. After a while it won’t feel like you are alone anymore.
Advertisement— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) August 28, 2015
3. We need all kinds of bfs
I need a Bf
bf as in Benjamin franklins
as in $100's— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) August 27, 2015
4. Our thoughts. Every time.
attractive person: hey whats up?
Advertisementme: who paid u
— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) August 20, 2015
5. Damage Repair
does it work on emotions pic.twitter.com/bBBah6SfAX
— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) August 22, 2015
6. If only that could be a legit job…!
if i got a dollar for every time i thought about you, i would start thinking about you
— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) August 19, 2015
7. Conditions Apply
i get ignored so much
my name should be terms and conditions
— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) August 18, 2015
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8. This is happened to a lot of us
i'm not ignoring your snapchats, i'm just too ugly to reply at the moment
— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) August 15, 2015
9. Also my face
person: I like your name
me: thanks, I got it for my birthday
Advertisement— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) August 9, 2015
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10. Life’s D.O.A
im so naturally funny because my life is a joke
— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) August 7, 2015
11. Ugh… HATE IT!
dont u hate it when u offer help and the other person says yes
Advertisement— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) July 30, 2015
12. Priorities
don't cry because its over
cry because ur ugly
— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) July 27, 2015
13. She did
The only joke my mom ever made was me
— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) July 17, 2015
14. It’s really just science
if u like water u already like 72% of me
— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) July 16, 2015
15. Stop accepting my empty gestures!
i hate when i offer someone food and they accept
— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) July 9, 2015
16. Pro-procrastination
the only nation i will ever rule is procrastination
— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) July 2, 2015
17. That’s a dropup line
did it hurt wen u fell from heaven?
cos u look like a ded bird
— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) June 25, 2015
18. To all the bed bugs
waking up everyday seems a little excessive
— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) June 22, 2015
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19. So cute!
when ur crush texts u cute things like
"who is this" and "how did u get this number"
— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) June 21, 2015
20. Poor people problems
Livin la vida broka
Advertisement— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) June 1, 2015
21. The Papito Diet
i was on a diet for a month and all i lost was 30 days
— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) June 1, 2015
22. It never got all hot and sweaty
i broke up with my gym
we were just not working outAdvertisement— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) June 12, 2015
23. Addition.
my face is a 4
my personality is a 6
so basically i'm a 10— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) June 9, 2015
24. No difference there
my wallet is empty just like my soul
Advertisement— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) June 5, 2015
25. Keeping it real
doctor: are you sexually active
me: i'm not even physically active
— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) June 3, 2015
Tell us which tweet you liked the most?
